Sometimes, I wish I smoked pot...

What a week from hell...geez. Is the semester over yet? Times like these make me almost wish I smoked pot or something. I could definitely use some chill out time.

I know, I know everyone is tired of hearing about how stressful my Ph.D. application process has been but, hey, tough bananas. I'm losing my mind with this stuff!! Can't a girl whine a little sometimes? It just feels like a never-ending ordeal. Just when I think I've got it all together and ready to go, I check the webpage and *poof* another magical requirement seems to pop up from nowhere. arg. I feel like I have NOTHING left to say. Why do I have to project what my dissertation (of at least 2 years down the road) will be?? How the hell should I know? I thought the whole idea of a doctoral education was to figure out exactly that-- what I will do with the rest of my life. It's so nerve-racking. I worry that it's all going to be a gigantic waste of time and money; every one of these places will just say, "Sorry, you're not what we're really looking for right now." Then what? I haven't even had time to imagine what Plan B would be. I literally have all my little eggs packed into the Ph.D. basket.

I guess I'll do that over Christmas break. Thanksgiving is already taken-- two term papers and more thesis research/writing. Not that I'll get any of that done-- I never do when I go home. All I want to do is let my mother cook and fuss over me, go shopping with her, watch too many movies and sleep late every day. Just be a total bum, in other words, since I never get to do that during the year.

I'm gonna have a girls' potluck with my roomie and some friends Friday night. They don't know it yet, but we're gonna have a major "Apples to Apples" match. I can't get enough of that game. Way too much fun-- and so wacky it always makes me laugh, which I need right now.

Saw "Cars" last night and ate too much. It was just what I needed. What a funny movie. I loved it so much, I would consider buying it. I sometimes just get overloaded with the "adult" world and a good kids flick is exactly what I need; a little thoughtless fantasy and humor never hurt anyone.